STORIES OF
LOVE , LAUGHTER, CHILLS & THRILLS
LGBTQ AUTHOR & NARRATOR
NEED TO CATCH UP?
[PART ONE] [PART TWO] [PART THREE]
BLURB: I have a place for everything. Yet, lately, my reality is fraying. Badly. It’s not just what’s missing; it’s the way they’re being taken—and then returned! Someone on Reddit called it a Thumbnail Demon infestation, and if they’re right, my “forgetfulness” is actually something much worse than a sanity slip!
I toss and turn all night trying to figure out what to say in this DM.
I know, I know. I’m not writing a peace treaty to unite the Middle East, but the conflict I feel over choosing my words carefully, feels nearly as dire.
What am I supposed to say: “Hi, my life has been turned upside down. Missing items. I think I’m going crazy. Can you validate that I’m not?”
Okay, just breathe. I’m overthinking this.
Yet, it’s one of those situations where I can’t help it—especially a neuro-spicy brain like mine.
I get a few hours of sleep, and when I wake up, it’s very early. Ted has just gotten in, kisses me, falls into bed mumbling something about me being up awfully early, and then starts snoring. I go directly into my office and type out a DM to u/ParaExterminator666.
“Hi, you don’t know me, but I saw your reply on a post by the now-deleted poster called Bubumeister22. This would have been very recent. You offered to help her with her Thumbnail Demon problem. To be honest, I have never heard of anything like that, but the details of her personal account are the same as mine. It’s becoming such an issue, I’m worried I’m going insane. I don’t know what’s going on, but I hope you can provide some insight.”
I hit send and then go to his account. No posts, but lots of comments on posts similar to Bubumeister’s. This ParaExterminator guy wasn’t online when I sent this, but the green dot for his account almost simultaneously lights up at the same time a reply comes through.
“Hi Mary. Can you tell me some of the things going on to make you think you might have a Thumbnail Demon problem?”
“Well, like I said, I don’t know what that is, but…”
I go on to highlight as many of the weird things that have occurred in the past week. I try to detail every single missing item I can remember. The reply ends up being very long. He responds quickly.
“Yup, definitely sounds like you got yourself a nasty infestation of Thumbnail Demons. I can help. I do charge a fee, but it’s not much more than your ordinary pest exterminator.”
We go back and forth with some details. I’m surprised that he lives in my area.
“That’s awful convenient,” I mumble to myself. Something about that feels off, but I can’t really determine why. Too many coincidences lately. Finally, we agree to meet after I get off work on Thursday. That’s three days from now, but what choice do I have?
In the meantime, this guy tells me I should buy blueberries and BBQ or RedHot flavored sunflower seeds. Then place them in locations where things have gone missing.
Upon getting this message, I audibly scoff.
This lunatic has gone too far. He’s been yanking my chain all along. But when I question this, he’s dead serious. He explains the little buggers like small snacks. Especially fruits and nuts that come in self-contained “natural containers,” if you will.
I ask, why BBQ or RedHot flavor? That seems oddly specific.
He replies, “…has to do with the spiciness factor. Little demons, after all. Spicy snacks for spicy little creatures.”
This is too much. I close my laptop, not replying to that last text. He can’t be serious! And yet, I’m at a loss. Just as Bubumeister warned, it’s getting worse. I feel like I’m the only one who has taken notice.
But, no, that’s not true. Eddie saw the screws missing, and Ted couldn’t find the spice cap.
Okay, I’ll give this a try. If it doesn’t help, I’ll check myself into the mental ward. But for now, what do I have to lose?
I’m out $10 for a fruit and nut purchase. Oh, and the guy’s fee, which I Google; the cost is comparable to an exterminator for roaches and ants. He’s not wrong. I already feel I’m losing my mind. I can’t believe I’m considering this.
But what’s one more thing to add to the ever-growing list of my sanity coming into question?
After work, I stop in at the Brown Barrel Market. I buy the blueberries—he said they had to be fresh—and two packs of seeds: hot and BBQ.
I’d love to do self-checkout, but it’s a small town. Acadia, Connecticut. Still does that New England, full service, hometown pride thing. I’m not driving an extra fifteen minutes to the big-box grocers just to buy three items.
Thankfully the teen at the counter, Gage, looks utterly spaced-out and preoccupied as he moves through the motions of checking me out. Poor kid looks like he’s got problems of his own…
When I get home, I immediately place the food items in all the key locations of the recently missing items. This is what the guy instructed me to do.
“Here goes nothing,” I think ruefully.
I go to sleep, and when I wake up the next day, I go and check every spot I put the little ‘traps.’
I’m completely taken aback by the results! I notice many of my items have been returned, and in their place, the seeds and nuts are gone.
“Well, damn. I can’t believe that worked.”
I had fully expected it wouldn’t, and I’d be telling that guy never mind and to F-off. But I guess I’ll be keeping that appointment.
The days leading up to Thursday drag on.
While the nut and berry solution seemed to quell these—demons—it didn’t completely solve the problem.
First off, there was a logistical problem. This was not sustainable. I could only leave the “offerings” in places where Ted wouldn’t see them. I was more worried about him interrogating me, if he found them.
I couldn’t very well leave a blueberry where the toothpaste cap had been, so I had to find places as close as possible.
Not to mention, not all offerings were taken, so I had to keep track and collect the berries so they wouldn’t rot.
The demons didn’t seem to like the seeds as much as the berries, but sometimes the cat would find the berries and eat them and spit them out. Then I had to clean up the stain and the mush mess.
How did my life get here?
I slapped my hand against my forehead and dragged my fingers down my face. Thursday couldn’t come soon enough. I was so nervous letting this man into my house. I realized I hadn’t gotten his real name or business website.
My nerves were so frayed.
What the hell was I thinking?
[PART 5]
First Published on Reddit March 5, 2026
Copyright © 2026 by Mary Black Rose & Black Rose Reads
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